Day 16 : Visions & Breakfast

Attending an early morning mass is always a great way to start the day, and is a perfect weekender. I was at peace knowing that God is glorified through the Eucharist. While praying at the cross, I suddenly had the worst scenario flashing in my mind - being in Team Middleware, and having a graveyard shift. My heart couldn't stop pounding, and I held back my tears. No, no, no... 

I had a vision of 'what could it be like' if I were on a graveyard shift. [X] Higher Pay, [X] Breakfast with them, [X] Miss out on lunch, but it's okay anyway since they'll be taking a nap in the afternoon too, [X] Dinner with them, [X] Chitty chats before I leave for work, [X] Work while they're sleeping, [X] Not missing out too much. It is somewhat better than mid shift, if time spent with them is all I'm worrying about. The pay is bigger too, if saving matters to me. The only thing I'll be compromising is my health and oh so juicy eyebags. Fark. What about the transpo? Of course, I need the car to get to work. Commuting might be an option since it's early in the morning anyway. Sheesh. It's like switching on THESIS MODE. 

On the other hand, I reminded myself of my mantra - "All things are possible with God... Only Believe." Why then am I limiting myself to the scenarios presented to me? Should my prayers be only based on uncertain events? For the past few days (weeks, I guess) my prayer is this - if I am meant to stick to my current project, Lord please, please put me on a day shift. If you'd permit me to be transferred to another project, I'd still be very grateful because I'd be in a role that I want, and a location reasonable. But you know the true desire of my heart Lord, even better than I do... whatever your plan for me is, give me the strength to embrace it. Too many if's, too many conditions, before surrendering.

It got me thinking, that there are a bunch of scenarios that could happen that is beyond my train of thought that only God knows. I have been narrowing myself down to what reality presents. My original prayer before, with full acclaim, is to be a business analyst where I could exceptionally excel, be assigned on a day shift, in Libis or Ortigas. Perhaps I should combine it with faith, and completely surrender to the Lord.
You know the true desire of my heart Lord, even better than I do... You know what I need before I ask it, you know where I should plant my seeds of passion and hard work, you know what to do to make me become the woman you want me to be. Whatever your plan for me is, please give me the strength and joy to embrace it, and let thy will be done. 
We took home pancakes from Mcdo and had breakfast at home. It was a joy-filled morning too, and I gazed upon my mother who truly is very beautiful. I want to see her like this, everyday. Cobee bounced his way up on our bed to join us (mmmm so cutieee fatty wooshy!). My sister took a picture, of our simple and sweet breakfast on the First Friday of May.