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"in all things, we are more than conquerorsthrough him who loved us." Romans 8:37
Last year, I had to endure a tough season that took me a while to overcome. I had quite a number of relapses and manic episodes in the first few months after confinement and rare but high intensity breakdowns halfway through. Before covid-19 happened, I was pretty confident that I'm on to my season of spring. . . but almost 2 months into this lock down, I've been having outbursts and symptoms caused by triggers. I found snippets about "LIGHT" in my 2019 journal that helped me cope. Sharing that light with you all the more now -
COVID started to spread slowly, but the quarantine and other drastic changes happened all at once. Just as how life gives you plot twists and turns! You'd often have little time to adjust and let go of a chapter, and you'd be forced to start a new book. Yes, March was like autumn, just as how I had my unexpected pregnancy back in 2017. Autumn, is the the end of 'what was', and the beginning of 'what will be'.
But we're caught in the middle of 'what is', and that's where we usually spiral through emotions and thoughts. In the mundane, in the whirlwind, in the chaos of it all - there is light. But we won't find it unless we seek it.
And so we seek, to find light -
in the quiet moments upon waking up, or being in the middle of a tiresome chore; taking a warm shower, or sitting on a comfortable cough; hearing someone endearingly call your name, or getting a phone call from a friend; having that perfect cup of coffee, or getting that first bite of a long-time craving; writing on your journal again, or reading a new book; laughing in the mundane, or sobbing in the middle of a netflix marathon. . .
Notice how the moon and the stars shine -
You see, light may seem small but if we find it, and focus on it, it makes everything a little brighter than it is.
That's what I did last year. One day, one moment of light at a time, until I finally got past my season of a long and dark winter.
Once you find it, and focus on it, you'll slowly find yourself being that 'light' for others.
* Read later for context : depression (part 1) * https://www.thewonderhuman.com/2019/03/depression-road-to-recovery-part-1.html
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